Coy Barista Indicates She “Totally Wants It” With Polite, Forced Smile

by Emily Halaka

LOS ANGELES, CA – A typical morning coffee run got a little hotter this week when local barista and total fox Evelyn Rogers openly and undeniably flirted with one of her male customers.

“I ordered my drink, and she was like, ‘That’s $4.75. Will that be all for you today?’” said longtime Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf patron Philip Grant, who was targeted by this beguiling minx. “It was super forward. She basically asked if we could get it on right then and there.”

According to bystanders, the coquettish Rogers made polite eye contact with Grant as he ordered, and after handing him his receipt continued to entice him with a rigid, closed-mouth smile betraying her overwhelming sexual attraction.

As Grant waited for his order, the siren of desire was seen sorting through the cash register to make change for another customer, clearly avoiding his gaze for fear she would embarrass herself with another amorous outburst.

“I’ve been coming here a long time,” said Grant, slurping his latte. “But man, that was something else. She wants it so bad. It’s like, save something for the imagination.”

Grant wasn’t the only one shocked by this sly temptress. Rogers’ supervisor, Jake Gomez, disdainfully noted her attire: “Every day she comes in and pins her nametag to the top of her apron. You know… in the boob area.”

Rogers, in the midst of her rush-hour shift at the time, was unavailable for comment, but continued to brazenly seduce with comments such as “Have a good day,” and “Would you like room for cream?”