Quiz: How Alone Will You Be On Valentine’s Day On A Scale from ‘Very Alone’ to ‘I’m Willing to Take a Quiz About This’

By Alexandra Ornes

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, the question on everyone’s mind is: how alone will I be on V-Day? Well, Sack is here to help figure that out!

Are you in a healthy and happy relationship?

Yes, I’m happy with my relationship, unlike you… fucking loser

To some extent, yes, but to another more realistic extent… no.

No, I haven’t felt the warmth of another human in many moons

What’s a relationship?

Correct!

Wrong!

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What’s your perfect Valentine’s Date?

Going cloud gazing

Getting covid tested together (spitting in a tube is the peak of romance)

Sacrificing a newborn

Going to outdoor dining at a restaurant in LA like a dick

Correct!

Wrong!

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How many squishmallows do you currently have on your bed?

0-3

4-6

7-10

10+

Correct!

Wrong!

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What is your go-to romcom when you feel lonely?

When Harry Met Sally

Crazy Rich Asians

Die Hard

I actually just watch true crime documentaries, thank you very much.

Correct!

Wrong!

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Which song lyric speaks to you, on a spiritual level?

Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you

Since you been goneeee I can’t breathe for the first time

But now. There’s nooo where to hide Since you pushed my love asideee Iiii’m out of my head hopelessly devoteEEEed to youuuuu

And iiiiiiieeeiiiiii will always love youuuUUUUU

Correct!

Wrong!

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Finally, Are you ok? I mean you took a quiz about being alone so I’m guessing you need a hug.

It’s fine… I’m fine

No yeah, I’m vibing... i think

Actually it’s been a pretty rough couple of months

*maniacal laughter*

Correct!

Wrong!

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Quiz: How Alone Will You Be On Valentine’s Day On A Scale from ‘Very Alone’ to ‘I’m Willing to Take a Quiz About This’ %%personality%%

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