Trojans Can Now Register for Post-Sex Cuddle After WebReg Fucks Them
By Alexandra Miller
LOS ANGELES, CA — The popular class registration site launched a new feature on Monday allowing students to add OT-069: Intro to Cuddle, a class specifically designed for students who have been fucked over all year by WebReg.
The one unit elective launched under the School of Occupational Therapy with hopes that it would make the student body aware that there is a School of Occupational Therapy. The syllabus states that the primary goal of the class is to increase the wellbeing of students by having their bodies naturally release Oxytocin to dull the pain of figuring out D-clearance.
“A class I needed for my graduation requirement was full and my advisor said to just take it next semester, but I am a second semester senior,” said Freddy Withers. “A good spooning really does soften the blow of having to pay for an extra semester.”
However, some students believe that the new course is not enough. “How about we just stop WebReg from crashing or, you know, actually send out D-clearance request forms on time?” said Marianne Martins. “Is this what our 2% tuition raise is going to?”
Despite its critics, the class has proven to be popular as the registration closed 45 seconds after it was opened. For all the students who couldn’t secure a seat just remember, we’re all getting fucked together.