Pelosi Visits Beautiful Chinese Taipei, Bless Our Fearless Leader Xi Jinping

By Jackson Irvine

CHINESE TAIPEI—The United States Speaker of the House touched down in Chinese Taipei on Tuesday, much to the joy of the country’s fearless leader Xi Jinping. However, many falsehoods quickly spread about Pelosi’s visitation, including claims she posted anti-Chinese sentiment on Twitter (which is luckily banned in China). Some have tried to claim she is in favor of “Taiwan as an independent country” and that “China needs to release its autocratic control of Taiwanese leadership.” However, these claims have been disputed, as Chinese authorities are currently interrogating Taiwan sympathizers by poking them with sticks and inquiring whether anything happened June 4th, 1989 at Tiananmen Square.

“Nancy Pelosi” by Gage Skidmore is licensed under CC BY-SA 2.0.