USC Students Eager To Find Out If They Wasted $200 This Year

By Izzy Ster and Jackson Irvine

In anticipation of the premiere of USC’s newest additions to the football team, including star quarterback Caleb Williams, many students are waiting to see if their tickets were a worthy investment. “I mean, I’m anticipating passing out due to a mixture of borg and extreme dehydration, but I’m really, like, anxious to see if I should’ve bought that really sick neon sign for my dorm instead,” said freshman Paul Moore. In true Trojan spirit, students are planning on either celebrating the big win with copious amounts of alcohol or pivoting and drinking the pain away.