New High Fashion Streetwear Brand Just a T-shirt Store
By Zoë Rush
FAIRFAX, CA — After lining up for the grand opening of the new streetwear brand titled “C10thes,” locals were disappointed to find that the store only sold t-shirts.
“What we strive to accomplish with this brand is reminding the community what made streetwear great to begin with… price gouging,” said Cl0thes founder Vincent Cruz. As onlookers peered through the storefront, they found that it was nearly identical to a boardwalk novelty store. “Some of our bestselling prints so far are ‘I’m with big head’ and ‘Fish love me, women fear me’.” The store expects a boom in business when they release their next line of shirts, which make it look like one is wearing a bikini.
While taking a look into the labor process that goes into the brand, Cruz revealed his personal methods for creating shirts. In the store’s back room, a USC dropout named Caden was found gluing Cl0thes tags over the Gildan logo on already printed t-shirts. When questioned about the origin of their designs, Caden explained through puffs of his boysenberry STIIIZY, “Yeah, I don’t know. Vince just has me go on eBay and buy a bunch of these. And then I tag ‘em and price ‘em. Honestly, an infant could do it.”
The new store has garnered mixed reactions from the public. Local hypebeast Rad-em Sandler is a big supporter of the brand: “I fuck wit C10thes heavy, bro. I waited in line all night for the grand opening. They even let me cut the ribbon with my officially licensed Supreme ax.” However, many customers don’t share Sandler’s enthusiasm due to the products’ heavy price tag. When asked whether she had made any purchases, Stefanie Johnson, a local passerby, responded “No way. Everything in there costs as much as my tuition, but you can get all of it on Amazon for like 50¢. My friends and I just thought it was a really elaborate piece of performance art until we saw people buying things unironically.”
Since his interview, Cruz has declined to make any further statements about Cl0thes as he is currently facing three separate class action lawsuits.