Kanye Apologizes, Claims Twitter Account Was Hacked by Kanye

By Liam Stephenson

WASHINGTON, D.C. –  After an onslaught of racist, antisemitic, and generally bigoted tweets, Kanye West claims that his recent statements were published by Kanye West without his consent.

“He never even reached out to me,” claimed Kanye, in reference to Kanye. “I fully agree with what he said, but I just wish he got my approval. If I talked to him beforehand, I could’ve helped him. I could’ve told him about other minority groups to scapegoat, slurs to use, etc. Also, Pete Davidson fucked my wife. Sorry – me and Kanye’s wife.”

In a surprise move, Elon Musk has publicly disapproved of the tweets. “We have decided to permanently delete Kanye’s recent tweets,” stated Elon Musk. “We have no tolerance for such woke nonsense on this app. He wasn’t nearly racist enough for our standards – if you’re gonna be a nazi, at least do the salute. I practice it in the mirror for hours after President Trump lets me out of my dog kennel.”

Kanye has since promised to never let this happen again, until he really wants to.