SC Loses After Freshman Forgets To Kick Lamppost

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – As the Trojans concluded their lackluster Big 10 season with a loss to

Instagram Stories Mourning The Loss of A Nation Interrupted By Fun Birthday Shoutout

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA—As millions of Americans sift through the heated political discourse and cries for democracy’s salvation

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – Modern culture has made leaps and bounds in promoting the values necessary to

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – In an effort to maintain student attention, USC will play cropped footage of

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – During Professor Horace Broadlong’s Astronomy 200 lecture, an entire auditorium of students sat

By Bill Rockas MILWAUKEE, WI – Tragedy struck at 6:20 P.M., December 15 when a small group of carolers were

By Bill Rockas BOULDER, CO – Forensic scientists are conducting various tests across multiple social media platforms to understand whether

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – Taylor Swift, the paragon of pop singers, the generation-defining giant, timber-er of Ticketmaster,

By Bill Rockas LOS ANGELES, CA – USC football fans are shocked after the reveal that defensive coordinator Alex Grinch

By Bill Rockas AUSTIN, TX – After multiple rejections, Economics major Carl Smattford has resorted to explaining the quantifiable